Small Stones Day 25: Superwoman

It may be winter, but in Florida Spring is bursting out all over. Yellow pollen is showing up on my car and tickling my nose. As a result, I was feeling a bit under the weather today. I carried on, even though I could have easily spent the day at home taking care of myself. Funny how those of us who love to care for others, don’t always treat ourselves with the same loving kindness.

I was thinking about how often we feel like we must be superwomen. We will soldier on, despite physical pain or illness. “Who else is going to do it?” “They can’t function without me” and similar declarations march through our thoughts. We do ourselves, and others, a great disservice when we play superwoman.

We deny ourselves the chance to relax, to repair, refresh and replenish our energy. We do not pamper ourselves or treat ourselves to the same tender care we offer to others. We abuse our bodies and spirits in this way. It’s no wonder our illnesses linger, our energy takes so long to return, our bodies ravaged from our own lack of respect for ourselves.

We also deny others the chance to do for us what we’ve done for them. So the laundry doesn’t get folded just so, or dinner is canned soup and grilled cheese. It’s so difficult for many of us to get out of the driver’s seat and let someone else take control – even for a day.

I write this because I am guilty as charged. One of life’s greatest challenges for me is to accept help as graciously as it is given. To learn to receive in all aspects of my life. I am a giver by nature and that is my default setting. I finally have someone in my life who wants to do both the big things and little ones to make my life easier. It’s a sincere gesture of love, not a grudging nod to pulling his weight around the house.

I have learned that my children are eager to help me in many small ways, because they are now at an age when a kindness, like making their lunch, or buying a favorite cookie, does not go unnoticed.

So, this evening I took it easy.  I did not clean or straighten up or make dinner.  I let others do things for me. I’m feeling a bit stronger, and my loved ones are thrilled at the chance to give back a little something to me. Win-win situation I think.