Great Expectations...

Have you had a change the way you celebrate holidays? Are you having to redefine the sacred cows of holiday traditions?


Transition time is usually a time of great change and growth, not only internally, but within the confines of your family life as well. As my children have grown older, and divorce broke up the holidays, I find that it is time to redefine TRADITION.

I was already making the shift at Christmas from little ones who believed that Santa was on his way, to the reality that no one clung to that fantasy any longer. It changed some of the ways we celebrate the holiday. Although I miss that magic, I will admit it's a bit of a relief. I no longer have to work so hard to maintain the illusion.

My family continues to grow and change- one away at school and two teenagers. And not just my kids, but the extended family as well. I have five brothers and sisters and we have not been together for a holiday for many years. It was easier before kids, but as each of us began to settle down and raise our own families we began to create our own traditions.
Each of us had to maintain the the delicate balance of giving both extended families "equal time."

When the divorce happened, my kids were already older and many of the traditions of childhood had begun to be replaced with something that reflected their maturity. The kids have accepted the fact that times change and so do the ways we celebrate holidays. I don't think it's been necessarily a negative lesson. After all, learning to adapt to changing circumstances will help them become more flexible and resilient.

In the end, we all learn how to treasure the past while embracing a new experience. Isn't that the basis for life itself?